you have 10 seconds to think of a way to make the average vampire movie fresh and new and exciting again
A vampire going through the daily struggles of trying to hide his ever lasting boner— as rigor mortis is an unkind friend.
*dad isn’t a homophobe*
Easily impressed white tumblr: GIVE THIS MAN AN AWARD. DAD OF THE YEAR!!! PARENTING DONE RIGHT. THE PINNACLE OF HUMANITY
•go to the bathroom to escape
•feel very uncomfortable without a phone or some other crutch
•dwell on a small awkward moment for much longer than necessary
•never go to any social event without a person that makes you feel comfortable
•follow said person way too much
•worry about the person beginning to find you obnoxious
•faking an illness to get out of a social event
•Dont buy something necessary because the cashier is intimidating.